is this really happening?

again? seriously steven, twice in one year?
you promised yourself this wouldn't happen
again, or at least not for a while.

somehow I manage to "will" myself to meet and
make friends with certain people. Again, somehow I think
certain people are meant to be put in my life simply as
stumbling blocks and distractions. I don't need you, nor
should I want you. Its funny because I was in the exact same
situation last year. I know where this road leads if I pursue
it as far as I did. My infatuation was last semester with you,

so why is it NOW that you all of a sudden talk to me?
it doesn't make sense and its actually pretty frustrating.
Sadly, I am a sucker for smiles and quality time.

hopefully I will be able to keep my promise though.
FRIENDS first, and meaningthe GOOD type of friends for the RIGHT reasons.

I do hav to admit though, its a nice change for you
to talk to me. You can't see it,
but im actually smiling through my serious front =)

sidenote: hey thanks. I know youre thousands/hundreds of miles away from me, but somehow
i can count on you when I need a buddy to talk to. I think I miss you the most as its hard to
substitute our friendship here. I dont know because were still in the first year of real life (college),
but friends of the road? Nah. I do possibly believe youre one of them that'll stay. thanks.

what im doing now: I am currently in my 830 intro to psychology class. Its kinda depressing because the
lecture is on sleep patterns and cycles. I realized my sleep patterns suck. But I think this will be the best
time for me to plot out my thoughts.

more on this later. Have lots to do today. BOO for prac cello 15+ hours so far in the week. and its only wednesday!